Intimidating and Unwanted Behavior

Those of us who go into the healthcare profession, no matter the level we start at bring differences of learning, knowledge and backgrounds.  We come with the expectations to learn from those with experience and knowledge without judgement.  Many of us learn differently than others.  Some are very book smart and have difficulty performing in front of others.  Some learn better by a hands-on education and approach.  No matter the way you learn you should never be belittled or judged in front of others.  We all learn at our own pace.

What makes our profession wonderful is its ability to empower each and everyone of us as individuals and recognizing our own unique gifts we bring to the table.  We all have our strengths and differences and with that in mind conflicts could arise from others who may not have the same capabilities and may make situations difficult for you.  Not everyone has to like everybody, but we are all given certain opportunities to make our lives more enriched and fulfilled.  What I am trying to say is that bullying, harassment and incivility are some of the concerns I want to address.

Incivility pertains to rudeness, impoliteness and or discourteous behaviors and actions.  It is when someone imposes inconsiderate behaviors that violate mutual respect of another individual. To demean them in front of others whether it is about their dress code, questions asked or ignoring totally.

Bullying is the actions or behaviors that are intentionally demeaning, intimidating and could be abusive.  These actions can lead to one’s inability to learn or function in reality. There are two types of classifications for bullying the first is Covert behaviors which is when one rolls their eyes, makes faces, takes credit for work done by another or even holds vital information that can be important for specific care or a job to be done.  Ignoring and not listening to someone and turning away from answering any questions they may have.  Overt behaviors are belittling communication, open criticism, being excluded from social events, gossiping and backstabbing. Offensive insults or jokes made.  Just disrespecting an individual no matter who they are.

Harassment is similar to bullying but outlines the behavior more to unwanted and hurtful actions. May include verbal threats, physical assault and even humiliation.  This negative behavior can be based on any number of factors from age, sex, disabilities, or even religion or national origins.  No matter the reason it is wrong and should be stopped.

The similarities between them are all about power and controlled actions that hurt or harm another person emotionally or physically.  The persons who are targets or even a silent witness to the acts must remember the wrong doers must be stopped.  When you tell someone, you are decreasing the power of the person doing the negative behavior.  You are always part of a team whether in school or at a job.  Use them for your moral support and backdrop. Take any situation that is degrading or done to embarrass you up the ladder.  That is what chain of command is for.  There are policies and procedures in place in most organizations relating to codes of conduct, safe work environment and zero tolerance in any incident.  If you are fortunate enough and bold enough to approach the person or persons do so respectfully and tactfully.  Never be disrespectful and do it privately not in front of others. Then you should report the situation just to have a record of it.  While confrontation can be challenging and difficult for some there are always teachers, counselors, and managers that can help navigate the negative environment helping to provide strategies and solutions to a situation.  Having a mentor can help provide moral support and be beneficial in developing strategies to help reform any negative activity.

 As a young girl in middle school, I was bullied and belittled for a learning handicap and being a little different than others.  My support group after I finally told them were my parents and guidance counselor.  They guided me so that I could function every day and pass.

 When I went to college, I had a professor who bullied me and degraded me in front of the others because I was an LPN.  She did not like that I had some knowledge.  She preferred I knew nothing.  She definitely made my life miserable. Failed me and said I would not amount to anything and would never be a good nurse.  So, in spite of this one professor, I became a great nurse taking care of my patients and educating and mentoring new nurses to become the best version of themselves.  My support here was another professor and my mom. They knew my potential and capabilities and what I wanted most in life to do.

I know it is easier said than done, but let know one take away from you what you want most.  You are learning an education to better yourself and make other peoples lives better as well. Believe in yourself! Trust in your commitment of self-awareness and find your support groups to help and guide you in maintaining your goals.